The Love of A Marauder
by ScrapsCats
Summary: My name is Estrella Faline Kagen. My best friends are Lily Evans and Marlene McKinnon. Our lives are simple and neat: Go to school, avoid James and Sirius, and have fun. It's our seventh year, and our neatly ordered lives are turning upside down. Now… I solemnly swear I am up to no good…


**Title:** The Love of A Marauder

 **Author:** Scrap (account: ScrapsCats)

 **Disclaimer:** Don't own Harry Potter or anything in it. I do, however, own my OC's.

 **Summary:** My name is Estrella Faline Kagen. My best friends are Lily Evans and Marlene McKinnon. Our lives are simple and neat: Go to school, avoid James and Sirius, and have fun. It's our seventh year, and our neatly ordered lives are turning upside down. Now…

 _I solemnly swear I am up to no good…_

* * *

I use my fingers to comb through my black hair as I wait for Lily Evans and Marlene McKinnon at Platform Nine and Three Quarters, where we will board the Hogwarts Express for our third year at Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry. My mother had to drop me off and then go back home again to deal with a very difficult hippogriff. Suddenly, I feel someone bump into me.

"Miss me, Kagen?" Sirius Black asks. I scowl. Most girls at school are like _"He's a Marauder, popular, handsome, rich, and a good snog. What's not to like?"_ I, on the other hand, am of the opinion _"He's an annoying, troublemaking, arrogant toerag. What's there_ to _like?"_ Since second year when I became Remus Lupin's friend, he's been a constant source of annoyance.

"Shove off, Black," I growl, and push him into James Potter, who, I notice, is wearing a gleaming Head Boy badge on his chest. _Lily's not going to like that,_ I think. "Lily's not here yet, Potter. Pettigrew," I greet, somewhat curtly, nodding at the rat-like boy. I flash a warm smile at Remus. "Hey, Remus."

"Hey, Estrella," he says, and holds out my copy of The Hobbit, by J.R.R. Tolkien, which he borrowed from me last year. "Here, I'm finished with it."

"Did you like it?" I inquire, taking it and absently running my thumb across the faded gold lettering on the worn spine.

"It was good," he replies before being dragged away by Potter and Black. I grin and wave as he smiles back at me, then lean against the wall across from the barrier to wait for Lily and Marlene.

Soon, they pass through the barrier with Marlene's parents (Lily spent the last week of summer with them). We hug each other, laughing and greeting each other happily, and my pet pine marten, Chance, scurries up my arm and onto my shoulder, clutching my hair for balance as he chatters an energetic, happy greeting at them. We laugh and head into the train.

"Lily, good job on getting Head Girl," I say to the redhead as we look for a compartment. "But guess who got Head Boy."

She cocks her head to the side. "Who?" I grimace.

"Potter." I peek into a compartment and walk in. Lily and Marlene follow me, and we put our things onto the racks. "I'm not kidding. I saw the badge when they came over to bother me."

"Dumbledore must have truly lost his marbles!" Marlene exclaims. "James Potter; Head Boy." She shakes her head in disbelief. "I feel so horrible for you."

"Don't you have to talk to the Prefects or something?" I ask Lily. She jumps up and runs out the door. "Lily-!" I call, poking my head out of the compartment. The redhead is nowhere to be seen. Muttering in annoyance, I pull out my wand and tap an empty piece of parchment, which folds into a little bird. I pick it up and put my wand and silently putting an animation charm on it. I whisper my message to it, and it soars off through the train, hauling Lily's badge behind it.

"That was simply wonderful, Miss Kagen!" a voice behind me exclaims. "Wonderful! You really must join me for a small snack later." I turn around and force a smile for Professor Slughorn.

"I was only getting Lily's badge back to her," I say humbly. This seems to delight Slughorn even more.

"The invitation extends to her too, of course!" he says, bringing his hands together and looking into the compartment. "And you, Miss McKinnon. I hear your father is a well-known Herbologist, is that correct?" He drifts off without letting her answer.

I collapse back in my seat and look at Marlene. "Do you think I could pretend to be ill?" I ask her.

"This is Slughorn, Ella," Marlene says. "He doesn't give up that easily." I sigh in acknowledgement. I've been able to avoid the Slug club for years now, but I suppose my luck has to run out someday.

"I know," I sigh, "Slughorn's Slug Club is just so stupid."

She laughs and steers the conversation to less annoying subjects.

* * *

Sirius Black listens to James dreamily talking about Lily. Remus is reading one of his books, and Peter is staring at James, listening intently. Sirius' thoughts, however, are on a certain black-haired, blue-eyed girl.

"Anything from the trolley, dears?" an elderly witch asks from the doorway. James and Sirius stand up and examine the cart. Sirius is about to order, but a quiet, silvery voice interrupts his thoughts. He looks up and sees the raven black hair hanging in wavy curtains past her elbows coupled with midnight blue eyes and a small red mouth. Her muggle clothes - gray pants and a knitted blue jumper over a gray shirt - flatter her natural curves and display her willowy form. Her pine marten is draped across her shoulders, and a brown bag hangs at her side.

"Lily and I weren't in the compartment when you came by," Estrella Kagen says to the witch, who immediately asks what they want. "Oh… Drooble's Best, a Pumpkin Pasty… a sugar quill… Bertie Botts, and three Chocolate frogs. Lily, am I forgetting anything?"

"A cauldron cake," Lily Evans says from next to Estrella. "And Marlene wanted some more ice mice."

"Right - a cauldron cake, and a pack of ice mice, please." The trolley witch hands the sweets to the girls.

"That'll be four sickles and two knuts, dear," she says, and, with some difficulty, Estrella pulls out her purse.

"Oh, curse it all," she mutters. "I'm one sickle short."

In an instant, James is offering one of his silver coins. "Here," he says, and Lily looks up at him, a slightly surprised look flashing across her face before she smiles a little at him.

"Thank you, Potter," she says, and the two girls turn to walk back down the train.

* * *

"I don't know, Lils. Maybe he's changed," I say. When we had gotten back, the two of us had told Marlene everything, and we've been dissecting it over sugary treats ever since.

"Yeah, maybe he actually grew up over the summer," Marlene agrees.

A sudden thought hits me, and I sit straight up in my chair, my eyes widening in horror. "Oh, god," I whisper. "I can't believe I forgot - Oh, god…" I look at Lily and Marlene. "Dorea Potter, James' mum, died a week into summer. I was at her funeral, since mum worked with her."

Both girls cover their mouths with their hands, silent with shock. Finally, Lily puts down her hand and says, "Oh, god. That would explain the change."

Marlene nods, her hand still over her mouth.

We all fall silent, lost in our own thoughts. From what I see and hear, Sirius and James are as close as brothers, and Charlus and Dorea Potter were more parents to him than his blood mother and father. My thoughts drift to Lily. For a long time I have noticed the slight fondness she seems to hold for James. Maybe now she'll admit to it.

I'm startled out of my thoughts by Chance chattering in my ear. As my familiar, I can understand his noises, and we can speak mind-to-mind. He is dark brown with an off-white bib marking on his neck, and his paws are nearly black. He can perform basic magic by using certain series of noises.

 _What now, Chance?_ I demand.

 _There's a tiny human at the door_ , he answers, and I look out to see a second year Hufflepuff. I stand and open the door, looking down at her.

"Did you need something?" I ask kindly.

"Are you Estrella Kagen?" she asks. At my nod, she continues, "Professor Slughorn told me to ask you and your friends to come down to the end compartment for a snack." I nod, and she scurries away.

I pull out my wand and send a spark of energy at each of my dozing friends. "Slughorn wants us in the end compartment now," I explain, and they stand, groaning. "You go on ahead; I'll catch up in a sec."

They walk out together, and I summon a book and a stack of small paper squares from my trunk, then tuck them both in my small brown shoulder bag that already holds my wand and some other random things like a muggle camera and extra quills and ink.

I walk out of the compartment and catch up to Lily and Marlene right before they go in. When I walk in, I list everyone there in my head, thanking Merlin for my photographic memory. I take extra notice of the Marauders minus Pettigrew. Now that I know what to look for, I notice a lot of changes in both Sirius and James.

James has lost a lot of the arrogance in his gaze, and his mouth is curved in… well, not a frown but less than a smile instead of his old troublemaker's smirk. His eyes still glimmer with mischief, but it's tempered by the new responsibility he seems to show.

Sirius still bears his arrogant smirk, but it seems like he's only doing it out of habit because, when a fourth year bumps into him, he helps the boy steady himself instead of just watching arrogantly.

 _All in all,_ I think, _I believe I like this change._

We join everyone at the table, but there are no seats next to each other, so I end up next to Remus as Lily is forced to sit next to James and Marlene sits between Amos DIggory and Alice Prewett. I twiddle my fingers across the table at Alice, who copies me with the hand not holding Frank Longbottom's.

We start talking about our parents as we eat, but I zone out after the first person until Remus elbows me and Chance chitters Your turn! Tell them what your parents do!

"My mum, Isabelle, has a farm where she raises a lot of magical creatures, like unicorns and fairies. She even works with grindylows and fire crabs. I help her, sometimes. My dad, he's a muggle, owns a chain of muggle bookstores," I say.

"Interesting!" Slughorn smiles at Amelia Bones and asks her about her parents. Soon, I pull out the stack of paper and tap the top paper with my wand, making it fold into a butterfly that flutters into the air. Next, I make two birds, then a dog, then a stag, then a deer, a rabbit, bear, otter, fox, cat, wolf, mouse, bat, hippogriff, and panther. When Slughorn finishes asking the last person about their parents, he looks up and sees the paper animals and cries out in delight.

"Delightful! Is this your work, Miss Kagen?" he asks, and I nod, tapping the last piece of paper and making it into a pig. The animals run or fly around a few more times before each stopping in front of a certain person. The butterfly stops in front of Marlene first, and she smiles as it flies up next to her ear and, as I charmed it to do, whispers something to her. The butterfly is supposed to whisper something is beautiful about her. The birds stop in front of Alice and Frank, and sing loudly, telling them to get a move on already. Both of them go bright red and glare at me.

The dog goes to Sirius and leaps onto his shoulder, whispering to him that I agree with James: he makes an adorable dog. The stag and deer walk side by side up to James and Lily. The latter glares at me as she hears the message about getting her head out of her arse and taking a look at the stag. James' eyes widen as he hears that he really shouldn't leave his cloak around where curious little girls can find it on the day of a full moon.

The wolf runs to Remus and tells him that I don't blame him for not telling and that I won't treat him any differently, and to put it under the table. He does, and I make the wolf briefly turn into a boy and then back. I deliberately look at Severus Snape, who gets the bat telling him that nothing is set in stone until it happens, and that he can have a second chance if he wants one.

The panther comes to me, and the mouse goes to Slughorn. I don't pay much attention to the others' reactions, although everyone but the two other Slytherins seem pleased.

When Slughorn dismisses us, I look at Lily, Marlene, and Alice, gulp, and take off down the train. When I duck into an empty compartment, they walk past, and I walk back, eventually finding a group of Ravenclaws who are eager to let me share their compartment. They're sixth years, and one of them was at the Slug Club gathering, so she had me demonstrate the charm I used for them.

When the other Gryffindor girls pass the compartment, one of the girls, Tracy, lends me a cute beanie and another, Emma, lends me a sapphire blue sweater.

When we get off the train, I hunch down to their size and get in a carriage with them. At Hogwarts, I give back their clothes and promise to see them again in the morning before running into the Great Hall with the crowd. I catch up with Fabian and Gideon Prewett, Alice's cousins, and duck in between the two boys even taller than me.

"You'll help a prankster out, won't you?" I ask them. "I may have made two girls very, very mad at me because of a little fun." Seeing them look at each other, I cross my fingers.

"What's in it for us?" they chorus.

"I'll show you how to do it," I offer immediately, having already thought this over. I've done it before, and they always ask for something in return. They look at each other and do their weird silent conversation thing, nod their consent, and steer me over to their part of the table, blocking me from view.

The Sorting is relatively quick, with seven promising new Gryffindors, and Dumbledore's speech is practically nonexistent - something about having hope when it seems like there won't be an end to suffering. When the food appears, I show the Prewett twins the charm I used.

"I made Lily a deer and James a stag…" I start, a grin spreading across my face. "And I may or may not have told her through the deer to get her head out of her arse and take a look at stag…" The twin cackle. "I'll show you what I did to Alice and Frank in the common room."

They agree, and I pile my plate high with pasta and fruit. I bother them until they spill all of their over-the-summer pranks and family gossip. Apparently, Molly had married Arthur Weasley and is expecting their first child, and their great-great aunt Margaret moved to Italy (cue cheers from all three of us - Margaret is a pain).

As we walk up to the Gryffindor common room, I tell them about my summer taming hippogriffs and transporting kappas. When I tell them about collecting pixie dust, they bother me until I agree to sell some to them if my mum says yes. She probably will; she likes the Prewett twins almost as much as I do.

We sit in the corner and wait for Alice and Frank to enter the common room.

"You see those little paper birds?" I murmur to them softly. At their nod, I silently slide my wand into my hand and aim it at the bird nestling in Alice's hair. A second passes. Then a voice singing at them bursts out through the silence.

It calls, "Well, what are you waiting for! Kiss already!"

"Yeah," another voice said, coming from the bird on Frank's head. "We're tired of waiting."

I wait in the common room when the twins head up, and quickly make a paper dove and whisper a message for the Marauders to it. It flies first to Sirius and Peter, who are in the common room, then out the portrait hole to find the others.

Soon after, James, Lily, and Remus walk in with the first years, then send them up to their dorms. The bird is perched on Remus' shoulder, and when everyone else goes up, the Marauders walk over to where I recline on a Greek-style couch.

"I hope you filled Peter in, or this will take much longer than it has to," I say, and Remus nods. "Alright. So you want answers. I'll start at the beginning.

"I woke up from a nightmare one night in fifth year and went down into the common room.

~X~

 _I sat in front of the fire, warming myself. I don't know what I dreamt of, but it left me cold and shaken. I had already known about Remus being a werewolf. I'd figured out at the end of second year-_

~X~

"She beat us, Prongs," Sirius complains. I send a silent _silencio_ at him.

"Anyway…

~X~

 _I saw the portrait hole open and close with no one go through or come in, so I used a hearing enhancing spell and followed your footsteps. You're surprisingly loud, you know. And then I followed you out of the castle and to the Whomping Willow._

 _When a rat ran out from midair, I knew it was one of you. Actually, I guessed that it was Peter, since you were Wormtail. So I saw you shed the cloak and I followed you through the tunnel. When I saw you transform and heard Remus howling, I ran back out the tunnel, put the cloak back on the ground, and transformed myself._

~X~

"Before you say anything, yes I'm an animagus - a black panther. Have been since second year."

~X~

 _I followed your scent to the Shrieking Shack, and watched as you brought Remus around the grounds. I stayed downwind of you and kept to the shadows, but I followed you. When a villager started to get too close, I scared them away. All they saw was a pair of luminescent blue eyes, because I wanted to keep the rumor of ghosts going._

 _They ran screaming. It was actually quite funny. I always left right before you and came back just as Remus started to change back and made sure Madame Pomphrey didn't suspect what went on. I ruined furniture and scratched the walls._

~X~

"And she never did suspect," I conclude. "Especially about me. I drink Wide-eye potion the mornings after the full moons and if I'm especially tired I put a little invigoration draught in my morning water."

Remus stares at me, eyes wide. "You did all of that for me? And where do you even get the Wide-eye potion and invigoration draught?"

I go pink and look down and away. "You're my friend, idiot. Of course I'll do that for you. And… well, I make them. I asked McGonagall if I could have a cauldron set up in my dorm to brew the potions because sometimes I really do have a lot of trouble getting to sleep. It's also an important thing to be able to do if I want to become a Healer."

I shift my weight on the sofa cushions to make space for Remus. "I think Lily knows something's going on with me. She definitely knows you're a werewolf. Well," I say, standing up and yawning, "I'm off to bed. If you have questions, leave a message with the bird. It'll find me tomorrow. I wonder if I'll be safe with Alice and Lily in the same room…"

* * *

Sirius watches as Estrella as she disappears up the staircase with a look that causes Remus Lupin to smirk knowingly. He'd suspected for quite some time that Sirius fancies her. That makes his lip twitch in amusement. Sirius Black; the ladies man of Hogwarts, playboy. Ever since third year he'd had a new 'girlfriend' every week. He never truly cared for any of them, and chose them mostly based on appearances.

Remus can't imagine how Sirius had developed real feelings for her. She is very pretty with her hourglass figure, glossy black hair, violet-blue eyes, and porcelain skin, but she never wears the slutty clothes that most of the girls Sirius hooks up with do. She hadn't ever had a boyfriend. Instead of having a new boyfriend every week, she has a new book every day. Her snarky, disdainful outward personality, as Remus has seen, can fall away in an instant when she talks about something she loves. When it does, Remus has seen a gentle, passionate person with a past that tried to shatter her spirit.

Sometimes he wonders whether either of them know how Sirius feels.

"Goodnight, Remus," a soft voice says in his ear. The paper bird. "Tell the others goodnight for me too, and tell Potter good night from Lily. Layla says goodnight to you, too."

"Prongs, Lily says goodnight," he says, and a smile spreads across James' face. "And Estrella says goodnight to you all."

They stay in the common room for a little while longer before heading up to their dormitory.

* * *

 _I'm walking through a forest on a familiar path. The dirt is soft against my bare feet, and the rush of a distant river reaches my ears. Without knowing how the path is familiar, I follow it like it's something I do every day._

 _At the end of the path, I emerge in a clearing where the only light is the moon and stars. In the center of a clearing waits a sleek black panther. I sit across from it, putting my hands in my lap. The panther's eyes are identical to my blue ones._

I am here to guide you, _a mind-voice tells me_. I am your spirit guide.

 _"What's your name?" I ask, though I do not feel my mouth move. "Why are you only coming to me now?"_

You may call me Shadow, _she says._ You have hard times ahead. I am here to guide you.

 _"What does that mean, though?" I persist. Shadow cuffs me with a paw._

Kittens must listen, _she scolds,_ Not ask questions. Listen carefully.

Learn to accept change into adulthood. Do not leave behind responsibility. You are almost ready to leave your parent's den to hunt alone.

Do not lose hope. There is a spark in you that can spread throughout hundreds of people.

 _She sits, silent, and I stand up again. As I turn to go, I hear a low rumble coming from her, and the forest fades into darkness._

* * *

 **I hope you like this one. This was basically just them settling into Hogwarts again and a little something extra from Estrella's dream.**

 **I'm open to new title ideas and criticism - I want to be the best writer I can be.**

 **Updates are not always going to be on time, but reviews might make me update faster!**


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